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being nessasary

a quirky look into being

Category Archives: Love

Why hello faithful blog!   I have missed you – I am unfortunately using you for efforts other than your intention (sorta). Yes, it is a bit out of character – I deeply apologize for my disloyalty.

You see, I have to give a certain amount of FREE massages to get my grade for my Clinical Massage class (as well as my kinesiology  course).  While I have been on top of the game the entire quarter, things have been a bit choppy lately with quick cancellations and no-shows.  As you can imagine, it is a bit frustrating.  It is not only me that is effected, but also the other students who could have used my time slot with the massage table.

That being said, I would LOVE for you to contact me if you would like to receive:

1)  Side lying massage (1 hour)

2)  Face/scalp/neck massage note: you DO NOT have to remove any clothing for this!  NO products will be used on your face! (30 mins)

3) Foot massage (Reflexology) note:  you DO NOT have to remove any clothing for this! (30 mins)

yet another note:  The face/scalp/neck massage & foot massage (Reflexology) can be combined to create an hour (this is actually preferred – that way you will get your time’s worth).

*There is more information about the benefits of each massage at the bottom of the page.

My available openings are:

Tuesday, June 7  :  7:00 – 8:00

Wednesday, June 8 : 7:00 – 8:00

Friday, June 10  :  4:00 – 5:00 , 5:00 – 6:00


Saturday June 11  :  12:00 – 1:00  , 2:30 – 3:00 (this can only be a face/scalp/neck OR a foot massage)

Massages will be given at The Harrison College – East Training Spa.  The address, phone number and map are below:

Harrison – Indianapolis East Campus
8150 Brookville Road
Indianapolis, IN 46239
You can schedule an appointment by:
e-mailing me at
replying to this post (with your name).
sending me a facebook message.

*A little more information about the massages being offered:

1) Side-lying massages are often given to pregnant women, the elderly, and clients with certain injuries/disabilities.  Pillows cradle and surround the client into a very cozy position (I typically drift to sleep during one).  The goal of this massage is to relax the client and to relieve his/her aches and pains.

2) Face/Scalp/Neck massages are great for those with sinus (allergies!) issues, tension headaches, and high stress levels.  There are many places on your face that, with the help of massage, may help with congestion. Our tension headaches are often caused by our tendency to squint and scowl as we work (especially on computers).   Those muscles tighten up and pull on the rest of our head (this makes Tylonol and Advil very happy).  A neck massage can address achy muscles caused by bad posture (typical of people who sit down at a desk to work).  That scalp massage?  We all know how relaxing it is!

3)  Foot Massage (Reflexology):  Okay.  We know it feels good to have our feet rubbed, yet it is hard to get someone to do it.  Lucky for you, I will!  At the same time, I will work with you to address any issues you are having ABOVE your ankles.  Foot reflexology is like acupuncture, but without the needles.  It involves using the thumb to gently push certain points on your feet that have an energetic connection to another place on your body (come on, give it a try!).

I have learned many other trades this past quarter, but these happen to be the only ones remaining on my qualification sheet.  I will have a day or two in July that I will set up shop to give FREE 60-minute Swedish massage routines!!!


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My last post may have illuminated that I have been struggling a bit lately as far as anti-epileptic medications go.  Sleeping for 18 hours a day is not really my thing – there are way too many fun things to do out there in the world.  Including the anatomy homework I am about to attempt.

I forced myself out of bed this morning to do the most mundane and necessary of tasks:   laundry. I get a lot of peace from doing laundry – which I think is why I MUST have a washer and dryer in every apartment/condo I live in from now on.  Maybe even two sets:  one for when I go outside to play with my future mud-covered poochies/garden/hike/jump in a gross pond, and another for my amazing collection of underthings.

The thing is, I like simplicity.  It has been incredibly tough to apply the theory to my life the past 4 years with all the pitchy jazz that comes with cancer, the deaths of friends/those afflicted with cancer, medications, and relationships.  It takes a lot of deep breaths, a very strong support group, and a whole lot of the icey cream.

The more I attend my massage classes, the more I learn how many ways one can learn about their body, spirit, and the planet we live on.  The simplicity of having air in my lungs and a pair of hands to lay upon someone else’s body, gives me some of the simplicity I need – most of us are born with these two things.  No diamonds or decadent designs needed.

I suggest we all focus on simplicity, especially in the wake of the tsunami and earthquakes in Japan.  Many lost family, friends, homes, pets, and possessions.  I would much rather cope with the 10+ pills I swallow each day than lose my beloved family, friends, Betty and Maggie, and the roof over my head.

One of my favorite songs featured in the Waycross Camp songbook/sung at my grandmother’s funeral is called “Tis a Gift to be Simple.”  I will leave you with the lyrics:

‘Tis the gift to be simple, ’tis the gift to be free,

‘Tis the gift to come down where we ought to be,

And when we find ourselves in the place just right,

‘Twill be in the valley of love and delight.

When true simplicity is gained

To bow and to bend we shan’t be ashamed,

To turn, turn, will be our delight

Till turning, turning we come round right.

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I have a bit of a fascination with strangers and the strange.  I like talking to people I don’t know and will not know very long.  It is a great exercise in “putting yourself in an other person’s shoes.”  Making friendly conversation at bus stops and studying the faces  of those receiving pedicures makes an otherwise habitual experience different every single time.

There is one stranger that has a very special spot in my heart:  The Dancing Man.  After an absence of several months, Dancing Man returned to the Indianapolis intersection of 34th and College this New Year.  I first took notice of the definitive bounce in his step this past spring.  I initially thought he was just passing the time while waiting for the bus, but as my work day drives became more consistent, I noticed he would position himself at any of the intersection’s four street corners.  His rhythm never changed and his smile swayed like the streetlights.  He once positioned himself on the southwest corner where there happens to be a Rally’s.  He was boogalooing to his heart’s beat while hoisting a double cheese burger above his head like a prized trophy (I am sure it tasted much better than a metallic dust collector).

I have smiled and waved at this man countless times – once even spilling coffee all over myself to ecstatically greet him while  rolling by.  Most times he sees me, gives a special smile and amps his dance up a level.  He gives me a large bite of happy each time I pass his dance floor.

I haven’t the slightest clue as to why he boogies.  I really do not wish to study it.

One “dance” quote has become particularly irritating to me.  I’m not implying that it doesn’t provide the reader with warm and hopeful feelings, but because it more or less seems like a REASON to dance:

“Work like you don’t need the money, love like your heart has never been broken, and dance like no one is watching” -Aurora Greenway

It is also EXTREMELY overused.  I am happy not knowing why The Dancing Man dances.  He just does.  Maybe he’s nuts, maybe he dances for his God or Gods, perhaps he just feels the rhythm of the planet.  I do not care unless he tries tells me.  It is just fun to experience his energy.  I know that others feel it too:  I once saw two young men grooving alongside him.

I tip my hat to you, Mr. Dancing Man.  I love you without even knowing you.

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When a year ends, I tend to get a bit thinky – not like that is anything new.   I like to focus on what has changed in just 365 days.  It brings some perspective to the time I have been given on earth.  They don’t have to be super deep and dark secrets that I have shed light on or anything, but here are a few then and nows I am willing to share with you, my dear blog reader:

1)  A year ago, I swooning over my now boyfriend.  I was in the same room as him at 12:00 am January 1, 2010, but I did not kiss him. Instead, we kissed near the end of May.

2) A year ago, I was about to start a job tutoring high school kids.  Now, I am about to start school for massage therapy.

3) A year ago, I was 2 years post op brain tumor with no sign of recurrence.  Today, I am 3 years post op with no sign of recurrence.

4)  A year ago, I cried more.

5)  A year ago, I didn’t have another beautiful nephew on the way.

Give yourself some thought.  What changed this year?  What blessings were you given?  How do you feel about your world? Have you gained friends?  Lost them?  Did you get hitched?  Have a baby bless your life?  Give it some thought.  Make a list.  Smile a bit – we are a year’s history.

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First you gotta find the perfect box of cards. A difficult task when you are super sensitive to all religions and beliefs.  It is particularly challenging to locate a box of greetings that do not look like an elementary school teacher’s closet.  It took several stops this year to find some that are okay, just okay. Last year was much better: I had found postcards featuring vintage-looking holiday cartoons.  I loved them – plus my message space was limited.

I have struggled to send my well wishes to friends and family this year.  I have had a particularly busy December, but have had issues with being quite wordy.  The cards I selected are dramatically white on the inside!  THEY MUST BE BLANKETED IN BEAUTIFUL WORDS!!!  I want everyone that receives a card to feel a little more loved than, “Happy Holidays, Love Nessa (in some cases, “and Betty [pawmark]).”  I like to do a bit of updating, throw in a little thing that was special between me and the recipient, maybe even toss in a bad pun or two.

However, it has come down to the time where they are going to be belated.  If you haven’t received one and you are in my address book, I do love you!

I hope you can get by without your Nessa holiday cheer until after the 25th (I think anyone that is Jewish actually got theirs on time).  You may even get yours after the new year! How delightful to get a festive card post the “Winter is fun and joyous!” season.

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Oh fooie!  I’m late! The pipes burst, my cat got out, it snowed ten feet, my car wouldn’t start, and a rodent chewed through my computer’s power cord!!!

Kinda legit, right?

No, I did not follow through with my month long “write in your blog every day, Nessa” pledge. This is not because I didn’t wanna.  I found out Friday evening that one of the greatest friends a gal can have was only a feeble drive away.  After adventuring around the world since she graduated from IU in 2008, she has taken up residence in Maui.  Real unfortunate, right?  A sad story.  I feel really bad for her, having to come home to trump through the foot deep brack basting Indiana’s beheaded corn stalks.

Because her life is so sad and sunless, I decided she needed me to bring some light to her life.  I ventured to the old stomping grounds: Bloomington, Indiana, home of the Hoosiers.  I needed to get there bright and early, just so I could save her tan from fading.

I spent a lovely 24 hours laughing, eating, playing, and dancing with her family and a friend of ours.  The internet and my writing responsibilities could wait – or not even exist – in exchange for precious time with my beloved college companion. December 18, 2010 does not need an excuse.  It is safe to hold onto the handle, but it is much more fun to let go and let the wind take you (Thank You, Story People).  I like fun and laughing until you can’t breathe.  It is all good for your being. 

Too many yesterdays pass like the hummingbirds in your window feeder.  They’re there if you’re paying attention or if you catch their flirty feeding methods out of the corner of your eye, but if they’re closed, its like it never even happened. I really would have hated to miss a hummingbird in an Indiana December because I was too involved with a computer screen.

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please! let me be!

You’re doing your holiday shopping; shuffling store to store, sweating through your winter jacket, struggling to find the perfect gift.  Everyone is frantic despite the cooing of the “White Christmas” melody bombarding every scarf, sweater and stocking stuffer.  It’s maddness, yall, MADNESS!

I went to one of my favorite little gift shops this evening.  Typically hosting a few other shoppers and a small staff, I decided it was the best place to do a wee bit of shopping for some beloved family members and friends (NO! I am not going to give you said family and friends any hints!). The staff typically does the general, “Hi! Can I help you?” thing, but do not press you beyond the, “No thanks, I’m seeing what you have.”  Great Job!

But tonight, I was completely overwhelmed by a crowded shop and an overly friendly staff member.

While I love this store because of its artistic and quirky items, I felt smothered. One staff member in particular was frolicking from customer to customer telling them to follow him to his favorite gift items.  He eventually grabbed me and insisted on fondling my rather shabby old boot while trying to attach a magnetic broach to it (and hilariously failed).  He then proceeded to ask me about a pair of horrendous cowboy boot inspired wellies.  Heinously printed, he asked if I liked them.  I playfully answered that they were fabulous, but that I had my Hunter boots in the car. 

He didn’t stop then, he began presenting me with sweaters I should wear while presenting gifts to my loved ones.  I told him I could give them to them naked and they wouldn’t care.  I think he got the hint about then.  Humorously done, he left me alone.

It is aggressive salespeople like the one I encountered this evening that make holiday shopping for me unpleasant.  I enjoy the process of purchasing something special for someone I love.  I really do not like someone else picking out presents for the amazing people in my life.  It’s pushy.

Giving a lovely gift is a personal thing.  I try my hardest to give thoughtful and meaningful pressies all year round, even if they cost less then $2.00.  I like to make people smile.  So if it is a fart machine or a yodeling pickle toy, YAY!  I only ask to make my own decision.

Tomorrow is one of the busiest shopping days of the year, good luck friends!!!

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